The Right Wingers Have Been Pleadin' With Their Candidates To
"Tell Me Sweet Little Lies"
In their own words, first up:
Newt Gingrich!
"Go get a job after you take a bath." —Newt Gingrich, speaking in November 2011 about Occupy Wall Street protesters
"There's no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked far too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate." -- Newt Gingrich, explaining in 2011 why he cheated on his first two wives. He carried on the first affair while his wife was suffering from cancer, and the second while he was orchestrating Bill Clinton's impeachment.
"We don't do --you know, we don't do elaborate things. ... Well, go, you go talk to Tiffany's. All I'm telling you is we --we are very frugal." -- Newt Gingrich, in response to the revelation that he and his wife once owed between $250,000 and $500,000 in a credit account to the jeweler Tiffany's (May 2011)
“There’s a large part of me that’s four years old. I wake up in the morning and I know that somewhere there’s a cookie. I don’t know where it is but I know it’s mine and I have to go find it. That’s how I live my life. My life is amazingly filled with fun.” —Newt Gingrich, describing himself in a 2010 Esquire profile,
"A mere forty years ago, beach volleyball was just beginning. No bureaucrat would have invented it, and that's what freedom is all about." –Newt Gingrich
"She's not young enough or pretty enough to be the wife of a President. And besides, she has cancer.'" --Newt Gingrich, reportedly speaking to a friend in 1980 about why he was divorcing his first wife.
Mitt Romney!
"I purchased a gun when I was a young man. I've been a hunter pretty much all my life." (Romney's campaign later said he'd been hunting twice, once when he was 15, and once in 2006 at a Republican fundraiser)"
"I'm not a big-game hunter. I've made that very clear. I've always been a rodent and rabbit hunter. Small varmints, if you will."
"Well, the question is kind of a non sequitur, if you will. And what I mean by that -- or a null set." --after being asked during a Republican debate whether it was a mistake to invade Iraq”
“We should double Guantanamo!"
"I'm happy to learn that after I speak you're going to hear from Ann Coulter. That's a good thing. I think it's important to get the views of moderates." --right before Coulter called John Edwards a "faggot"
Ms. Michelle Bachmann In Her Own Words!
"Carbon dioxide is portrayed as harmful. But there isn't even one study that can be produced that shows that carbon dioxide is a harmful gas." -Rep. Michelle Bachmann, April, 2009.
"If we took away the minimum wage -- if conceivably it was gone -- we could potentially virtually wipe out unemployment completely because we would be able to offer jobs at whatever level." -Michele Bachmann, Jan. 2005.
"But we also know that the very founders that wrote those documents worked tirelessly until slavery was no more in the United States. ... I think it is high time that we recognize the contribution of our forbearers who worked tirelessly -- men like John Quincy Adams, who would not rest until slavery was extinguished in the country." -Rep. Michele Bachmann, botching American history while speaking at an Iowan's for Tax Relief event in January 2011. The Founding Fathers did not work to end slavery, and John Quincy Adams was not one of the Founding Fathers.
"Before we get started, let's all say 'Happy Birthday' to Elvis Presley today." -Rep. Michele Bachmann, while campaigning for president in South Carolina on what was actually the anniversary of Elvis's death, Aug. 16, 2011 (Elvis was born on January 8)
"Representative" Ron Paul!
“Few Americans understand that all government action is inherently coercive. If nothing else, government action requires taxes. If taxes were freely paid, they wouldn’t be called taxes, they’d be called donations. If we intend to use the word freedom in an honest way, we should have the simple integrity to give it real meaning: Freedom is living without government coercion. So when a politician talks about freedom for this group or that, ask yourself whether he is advocating more government action or less.”
"If you have ever been robbed by a black teen-aged male, you know how unbelievably fleet-footed they can be."
"Given the inefficiencies of what D.C. laughingly calls the `criminal justice system,’ I think we can safely assume that 95 percent of the black males in that city are semi-criminal or entirely criminal," Paul said.
Paul also wrote that although "we are constantly told that it is evil to be afraid of black men, it is hardly irrational. Black men commit murders, rapes, robberies, muggings and burglaries all out of proportion to their numbers."
Former Senator Rick Santorum!
"I have no problem with homosexuality. I have a problem with homosexual acts."
"I have nothing, absolutely nothing against anyone who's homosexual. If that's their orientation, then I accept that. And I have no problem with someone who has other orientations."
"I mean the fact is that some of this information that we have found out that led to Usama bin Laden actually came from these enhanced interrogation techniques."
"I'm always told that what I say is controversial. Why is it controversial? Because I speak from a tradition that has now fallen out of favor with the dominant media in this country. And so when I say things like marriage should be between one man and one woman, I'm called a bigot."
"If the most liberal man that's ever been in office can get elected when 20 percent of the population identifies as liberal then I think we can elect a conservative when 40 percent of the population identifies themselves as conservative."
"Isn't that the ultimate homeland security, standing up and defending marriage?"
"My feeling is, well, if it's my money, I have a right to judge."
TX Guv Rick Perry Gives Us His Versions Of Hoof-in-Mouth
Disease!
"I will tell you: It's three agencies of government, when I get there, that are gone: Commerce, Education and the -- what's the third one there? Let's see. ... OK. So Commerce, Education and the -- ... The third agency of government I would -- I would do away with the Education, the ... Commerce and -- let's see -- I can't. The third one, I can't. Sorry. Oops.''
—Texas Gov. and GOP presidential candidate Rick Perry, experiencing an epic onstage meltdown during a GOP debate, forgetting his plan to cut the Department of Energy, Nov. 9, 2011
"It's a good issue to keep alive. It's fun to poke at him." --Rick Perry, suggesting that President Obama's birth certificate is a fake, Oct. 26, 2011
"Is it the Mitt Romney that was on the side of — against the Second Amendment before he was for the Second Amendment? Was it — was before — he was before the social programs from the standpoint of — he was for standing up for Roe v. Wade before he was against first — Roe v. Wade?” -Rick Perry, fumbling over his attack lines against Romney at a GOP presidential debate, Sept. 22, 2011.
"It's a theory that's out there. It's got some gaps in it. In Texas we teach both Creationism and evolution." –Rick Perry, in response to a child who asked him if he believed in evolution during a campaign stop in New Hampshire, August 18, 2011.
"I don't think the federal government has a role in your children's education." –Rick Perry, at a campaign stop in Iowa, August 15, 2011.
"George W. Bush did an incredible job in the presidency, defending us from freedom." –Rick Perry in 2010.
Let's get real and re-elect the President, link up here:
This article was originally released on December 28, 2011.
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