I Me Mine
Sunday, January 8, 2012
The In Between The Debate-Debate or When The Candidates Weren’t Meeting The Press
Donavan's Sunshine Superman!
"Superman or Green Lantern have 'a nothin' on me!"
Superman doesn't make deals; Newt and Willard???
The In Between The Debate-Debate or
When The Candidates Weren’t Meeting The Press
Unabashed left has obtained exclusive documentation of the conversations between the Republithief Presidential contenders in Concord, New Hampshire during NBC’s “Meet the Press” debate between the 6 left standing 2 days before the New Hampshire primary. During the debate all the other 5 candidates tried to pile on Willard Romney, but being ahead in the polls by 20 points and even further ahead in the bankroll department, Willard just smiled whilst on camera. But off camera, when Willard didn’t realize an Unabashed microphone or others might be listening, Willard was less “Miss Congeniality” and more a psychopathic demonic combo of Monty Hall and Rod Blagojevich.
After the cameras shut down during intermission #1, Mitt tried hard to get Newt Gingrich’ attention, despite the fact that Congressman Ron Paul was in between the two.
Willard: Newt! Hey Newt! Can you hear me?
Newt: (stares into the audience blankly trying to figure out his next move).
Willard: NEWT! HEY IT’S ME, MITT!
Don't these dudes look the epitome of decorum in front of a silly
American Flag NBC set?
Newt: Oh for crying out loud! What do YOU want Willard?
Willard: I just really wanna apologize about that whole Iowa thing, yaknow Newt? Those ads really WERE horrible and unfair, and they did rip you to shreds. Accurate, but mean, I do have to say. So I’m sorry, man.
Newt: Big f___ing deal Willard! What good does that do me now??!! I’m gunnin’ forya now!
Willard: Listen, Newt, I have a proposal.
Newt: Ok, I’m listening.
Willard: Ok, here’s the plan. Because of my patriotism, my humility, and my just plain good looks and wardrobe selections, I am willing to let you pick anyone on this stage, yourself included for the number 2 slot at the convention. Except Ron Paul, of course!
Ron: HEY, THAT’S NOT FAIR AT ALL! (whiney voice), Whadya mean anybody “except Ron Paul!”
Willard: I’m talking to Newt; it’s not your turn, Ron.
Ron: The camera’s not on, I can talk as much as I want.
Willard: And we can shut you down as much as we want, Ron.
Newt: Hmmm. Interesting idea.
David Gregory: Ok guys, we’re back on camera in 3…2…1… go time.
So the 6 mixed it up again on camera for mass consumption again for 15-20 minutes or so, but meanwhile Newt, Willard and the entire gang no doubt had their thoughts focused on the next commercial break.
At the very peak of his awesome talents, George Harrison, along with the
help of bandmates John Lennon, Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr sang
I Me Mine
I Me Mine
"All thru the day, I me mine.
All thru the night, I me mine."
It truly is a sad state of affairs when I say without a satirical bone in my
body at work that this song more than any other represents this
entire Repubithief field, still standing or gone,
the Republicans in Congress,
Boehner AND McConnell,
the "Tea Party"
and the greedy
One Percent in
When they went to break Ron Paul said:
Ron: You guys better include me!
Newt and Willard in unison: Shut up Ron.
Rick (Santorum): I can’t help but overhear you guys; hey Newt that might just not be too bad an idea Willard has there! Don’t just close your ears to it is my suggestion. Let’s you and me talk after the debate, ok?
Newt: Like I said, I’m listening.
Rick (Perry): Wow dude, Willard, that ain’t such a bad idea. Listen, Newt, Texas DOES carry a lot of electoral votes, and I win every 4 years there. I may not know my ass from a hole in the ground, but I sure can win Texas voters. Just like Dubya in those regards!
Ron: HEY, I DON’T LIKE THE WAY THIS IS GOING!
Willard, Rick, Rick and Newt (in unison): SHUT UP RON!
Jon: I’m hearing all of this and sayin’ to myself, “Hell, what have I got to lose here?” Count me in. Newt, you’re the man. You know I’ll owe you bigger than anyone on this stage if I get that number 2 slot, and I NEVER forget a favor. Just ask Barack.
Willard: So whadya think Newt?
Newt: Are you willing to apologize publicly for your attack ads in Iowa, Willard?
Willard: If that floats yer boat, Newt, then ya got it.
Newt: Then it looks like you just might have yourself a deal, Willard.
Rick, Rick and Jon applaud wildly. Ron looks sad faced and dour.
David Gregory calls the gang back to attention….